carving a legacy
breathing into belief and burden when it has always been uncertain and glorious still
I am a mirror, the echo. The epitaph.
—Jorge Luis Borges—
I know my way around UQ’s campus now. I don’t have to look at the app or a map.
The St Lucia campus is large with so many buildings and hidden pathways and shortcuts and stairways that look the same at night, even with the twinkle lights.
But I’ve been around a bit. I’ve figured out the ways.
The ways for me, anyway.
I’ve gotten lost, double backed, and found my way again.
When I stopped worrying about finding places, I became present.
Aware.
There are signs everywhere, signs I never noticed until I didn’t need them.
I’m over halfway done with the first of three semesters, and my brain wants to plan out the rest of my life.
No surprise, I didn’t sleep last night. On the bus home, I talked to a friend about what I think I want to do, and got some good feedback and direction.
I need to figure out a few things, what my dissertation will be on, who I want to work with, what I want to study, and what I want to get obsessed about and hopefully turn into a PhD research plan.
My life.
I had some ideas bubble up when I first got accepted to this program, and while those are still there, I also know I want to get to the heart (pun intended) of my work in the world.
Beyond writing is the work of love, relationships, storytelling, healing, and grief.
With writing, all of these things exist and grow and morph and whisper their not-so-secrets.
They are universal and unique.
They are everyone and only me.
They are the turning of stars and skies.
I am meant to take on, surrender to, and immerse myself in something bigger than I think I can handle.
And that will become the memory, the epitaph.
It will become the mirror I must gaze into to truly see what asks to be known.
To name my life’s work is to name something that cringes to be called important.
Numinous comes to mind.
When people of the 1600s were ruminating on an adjective to reflect their awe of the mystical and supernatural elements of their experiences, they gave the nod to numinous, and quite aptly so. Numinous comes from the Latin word numen, which can mean both “a nod of the head” and “divine will,” the latter sense suggesting a figurative divine nod indicating approval or command. (English users were already using the noun numen, a direct borrowing from Latin, to refer to a spiritual force or influence associated with a particular place or phenomenon.) Numinous is not a common or everyday word, which seems fitting for one used to describe what is far from quotidian, and instead part of the realm of the spiritual, the holy, or the transcendent. — Merriam-Webster Online
Perhaps if I am opening to something mysterious, I must allow my knees to bend.
Perhaps if I am opening to wonder, I need to clasp my hands in curiosity.
Perhaps this journey asks me to be more reverent.
Perhaps I could do with some silence so the awe might echo loudly.
Perhaps I do not need to know what to carve in the stone, but rather I need to pick up the tools and learn how to hold them.
How to make space in stone.
Classes & Events
Pantheon: Stories of Love, Power & Magick from Greek Mythology - online - TBD
HEARTists Way: Connecting to Creativity & Inspiration - online - TBD
How to Connect & Support
Website: www.irisanyamoon.com
Biosite: https://bio.site/irisanyamoon
Buy my books at my Bookshop storefront or at online booksellers. Or ask a local shop!
Classes, presentations, and workshops here.
Podcast interviews and chats are here.
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Love the 'turning of the stars and skies'- thank you
Breaking down that illusionary wall between the sacred and the mundane - beautiful!